Seal of the Historical Accuracy Enforcement Bureau
Historical Accuracy Enforcement Bureau The past is final. We make sure of it.
Current Approved Past
Revision 12.4

Office of the Administrator

Contracts and Procurement

The Bureau procures materials, equipment, and services that must remain plausible across multiple periods. Vendors should read the era-appropriate materials standard before responding. Where a specification appears impossible, the Bureau is unable to explain the requirement and the specification stands.

Current opportunities

  • Solicitation HAEB-26-R-0044

    Archival Paper Capable of Retaining Superseded Text

    The Bureau seeks 40,000 sheets of archival paper capable of retaining superseded text. Full and open competition. The condition under which retention occurs is not releasable.

    Office of Records That Should Not Exist

Anticipated requirements

RequirementNote
Historically neutral footwear, sizes 4 to 16 Must be plausible in 60 periods and leave no archaeological signature.
Portable language package with no premature idioms Vocabulary lists may not print the restricted vocabulary.
One lock compatible with the Unfiled Key Specifications unavailable. The key may not be inspected.
Archival storage, 900 year term Facilities advises the rate is favourable on an annualised basis.

Vendor requirements

  1. Deliverables are inspected at the delivery date and at the date-of-delivery. Where these differ, both inspections apply.
  2. Government-furnished information is limited to what the Bureau is able to describe without establishing the condition that created the requirement.
  3. Past performance is evaluated across all periods in which the vendor has performed, including periods in which the vendor did not exist.
  4. Property recovered from a delivery is handled under Directive 6.3 and reported on Form 17-B.

This site accepts no submissions. There is no bid portal, no vendor registration, and no address to send a response to, because HAEB is fictional. See the satire disclosure.